Stillness should feel like peace, but for many women, especially the ones who’ve been through (or are going through) something hard, it feels like tension. Like holding your breath. Like waiting for the next shoe to drop. You finally sit down, but your shoulders are tight. Your jaw clenches. Your thoughts race.
It’s your body doing what it learned to do: protect you. When life felt unpredictable or unsafe, your nervous system adapted by staying on guard. Now, even when/if things are “fine,” your body doesn’t quite believe it. This is how trauma hides - in those quiet, in-between moments when your body should feel safe but doesn’t. The stillness doesn’t feel like rest. It feels like danger. The work isn’t to force calm, but to gently show your body that it’s safe to soften.
Healing starts with noticing the bracing, honoring why it’s there, and learning how to be still without having to be on high alert. Your body is just waiting for permission to stop surviving.
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